It’s almost time for Christmas, and let’s be honest: if it weren’t for us moms, nothing would get done. Or, well, that’s how it is at my house, anyway, and I’m pretty sure I’m not alone. I’m the one who got the house decorated. I planned the Christmas dinner menu. I did all the shopping. And yet, there’s nothing waiting for me underneath the tree.
Remember that SNL skit from a few years ago? It was called “Christmas Morning,” and a family of four were all celebrating. The husband and two kids were psyched about the amazing — and increasingly ridiculous — gifts they got, while the mom, played by Kristen Wiig, got nothing but a cheap-looking robe. “It hurt pretty bad, but I didn’t scream, because I keep the pain inside of me!” Wiig joked in the skit.
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It was almost immediately considered one of the best SNL skits ever, and why? Because it’s true. Moms do all the work, and while our families might notice, sort of, for the most part, it feels unappreciated and taken for granted. The “I got a robe” skit was popular because so many moms could relate… including me.
Every single stocking hanging on our mantel is full, except for mine. There are presents for everyone wrapped — all by me, of course — under the tree. And I’m also the one who picked out each and every present. I went grocery shopping to make an incredible Christmas breakfast and then, dinner. I’ll be the one making cookies to put out for Santa. And I’m happy to do all of this, really. I love seeing how excited and happy my family is on Christmas day.
But is it too much to want a little bit of thought put into making the day special for me, too?
Maybe I’ll be surprised, and Sunday, there will be surprise gifts there. Maybe my stocking won’t remain empty. But all I know is that no shopping has been done by certain other people, and there are no charges on my bank account to indicate some mystery gifts are on the way. And you know what? We all laugh at the “I got a robe” skit, but deep down, it hurts. It hurts a lot. But like Kristen Wiig said, we keep the pain deep down inside, because we certainly don’t want to ruin Christmas for everyone else.
I don’t want thousands of dollars in lavish gifts and I don’t expect the world to give me a giant thank-you for doing what, I really do understand, is just my job as a mom. But I still want to feel like someone is thinking of me on Christmas. I want to know that my family cares about me, too, and that it’s not just me giving and giving and giving some more. Like, yes, we’re moms, but does that mean we don’t deserve anything anymore? That we suddenly have to become selfless, self-sacrificing martyrs to our families without a single complaint? I just want to be special, too. I want a magical Christmas, too, but that’s too much to ask for, I guess. Because we all know what would happen if Mom doesn’t do the work to make the day special.
Due to the sensitivity of this topic, the author wishes to remain anonymous.
